(no subject)

I let him into my mind, to show how I feel. Trusted him with everything.
"I'll love you forever"
"Favorite person in the world"
Until you "don't feel the way you used to."

So much for how I feel.

Cut myself after not for several weeks, didn't really know what else I could do.

Everything reminds me of him.
I still love him.

Can't even describe my pain.

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.


back to reality

 williams back.
he used to show up at the end of my bed at night and then sometimes in the day, i used to think he was a dream but as i became more ill and the voices came i knew he was an imaganery friend, i havnt seen him in aaages, but recently ive self harmed and been depressed and then i look up and he is here, im quessing its that time of year again!!!

  • Current Mood
    awake awake

(no subject)

My dad doesnt look at me anymore and it hurts. Like its my fault im like this. Well maybe it is. I feel like im moving alot slower than everyone else around me. And detached really, like everyone else is one big mass and im, well im just me. Out of place and alone. The jack yeh that can only cure so much. But the pills make me feel like a robot, who needs it's batteries to continue to function. I'm afraid sometimes that there my only option.
  • Current Mood
    sick sick

(no subject)

I choked myself last night and I felt something. Not good. Not bad. Just something. My heart smashed against my ribs and I knew I was still alive. I passed out and woke up hours later to water in my face. My Dad was standing there. He just shook his head and walked away.

I sat downtown all day today, smoking cigarettes and drinking voddy, and I watched people cross the street to avoid walking passed me.

They know what i've become.

Cruel execution

What will, if person in a forest to chain on 5 - 10 meters and so to keep? Probably, he will to suck out water from ground, to devour a cortex and a moss... Interestingly: how many he will live, and what by strong will be his torment?


hey communiity
iim new here so iim jusz trynna express my opiiniionsz and emotiionsz
ii knO why iiitsz called the institutiion
liife iisz fuckd up asz hell
miine iis too yeah
iim siick asz fuckiin tiired of beiin happy and some shiit happendsz and briing me down
all i think about iis cuttin my damn arms and leaviin the blOOd traiil on them
ii need peOple whO feel my paiin and struggle and my emOness
fuckersz qet on my nervesz wiith that bullshiit "mii liife iis perfect"


iim tiired of peOple and theiir shiit and briingiin iit to me



talk to mehh :)