williams back.
he used to show up at the end of my bed at night and then sometimes in the day, i used to think he was a dream but as i became more ill and the voices came i knew he was an imaganery friend, i havnt seen him in aaages, but recently ive self harmed and been depressed and then i look up and he is here, im quessing its that time of year again!!!
;P
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- Current Mood
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awake
My dad doesnt look at me anymore and it hurts. Like its my fault im like this. Well maybe it is. I feel like im moving alot slower than everyone else around me. And detached really, like everyone else is one big mass and im, well im just me. Out of place and alone. The jack yeh that can only cure so much. But the pills make me feel like a robot, who needs it's batteries to continue to function. I'm afraid sometimes that there my only option.
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- Current Mood
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sick
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I choked myself last night and I felt something. Not good. Not bad. Just something. My heart smashed against my ribs and I knew I was still alive. I passed out and woke up hours later to water in my face. My Dad was standing there. He just shook his head and walked away.
I sat downtown all day today, smoking cigarettes and drinking voddy, and I watched people cross the street to avoid walking passed me.
They know what i've become.
What will, if person in a forest to chain on 5 - 10 meters and so to keep? Probably, he will to suck out water from ground, to devour a cortex and a moss... Interestingly: how many he will live, and what by strong will be his torment?
i'm always sad and depressed even when i'm happy i hATE EVERY THING ABOUT MYSELF i just need someone
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- Current Music
- I miss you by blink 182